relationship capital

[Adam Blatner]

Dear Peter, Connie, and all,
     Cleaning up emails, I'm intrigued by the concept of spiritual capital, and more with relationship capital.
           The latter term I can relate to: \

   Peter, though you're a bit uncomfortable with the term, still, your quote about "An English chap, Charles Handy, uses the term relationship capital in a similar way and also talks about have a bank account - can't quite remember the term - probably because it am not comfortable with it - his idea being that we make deposits into the emotional relationship bank account and that allows us to spend it at a later time - i.e. being influential and asking favours, being forgiven for faux pas and mistakes etc. " -- rings true and has implications for sociometry, especially in the arena of reciprocity.
      If I've reached out to some relatives---I'm thinking of some cousins---and received very few responses, after a while, I draw back, begin to send them cheaper Christmas cards, don't bother to include them if we're sending photos, gradually wean them from our emotional "investment."  The idea that we should have no sense of balance, equity, that we should forgive our enemies, is interesting. Does it mean that we should keep trying even in the face of evidence that the other person doesn't like us, or appreciate us?
     What gets me are those folks who are outwardly friendly, seemingly sincere, yet who are too busy to reciprocate, call back, do any outreach spontaneously. Yet they seem to be surprised if we become hurt or distant. It's as if they think their good will and genuine pleasure can make up for a deeper message that, aside from our moments of connection, it is clear that we don't have any priority in their list of to-dos.  The temptation is to stay open, but I wonder if one of the implications of sociometry is to watch for the evidences of mutual tele, reciprocity, those folks who seem as interested in us as we are in them. 
      
     As for spiritual capital, having read that passage, I confess, I just don't get it. Connie, can you offer a few examples of what this term means? Not definitions, which are abstract, but examples?

     Warmly, Adam
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