About Clare

[PATRICIA DESERT]

Dear Connie and Manuela--I am so sorry that you were hurt and felt offended by concerns around confidentiality.  You obviously were speaking from your hearts with your loving reflections on Clare's last days at Boughton.  You offered such a beautiful description of Clare's experiences and I never doubted that you both were coming from a loving place.  
        Perhaps sensitivity to confidentiality regarding peer work may be a peculiarly American thing as Rebecca suggested.  I know during my years of psychodrama training that before every workshop, whether with peers or clients, everyone was asked to take a pledge of confidentiality.  That meant that we agreed to refrain from talking about what others did in the group.  That gave me a strong measure of security to open myself to the group and to do some very painful work as a student.  On the other hand, I lost a sense of trust and safety when I heard people talking about the experiences of others in a group without permission from those persons.  This got a bit triggered when I read your email about Clare's work.  
        So I am very happy to know that Clare wanted you to share her experiences with us. I only knew Clare as a very private person who did not talk very much about herself.  I love that she wanted us to know her more, and I thank you for offering a beautiful memorial to Clare in such a gentle and loving community-wide way.  And I sincerely regret any hurt you felt as a result of my misunderstandings.  

Patti Desert
Baltimore, MD    


  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Connie Miller<mailto:connie at souldrama.com> 
  To: list at grouptalkweb.org<mailto:list at grouptalkweb.org> 
  Cc: iagp-psychodrama at yahoogroups.com<mailto:iagp-psychodrama at yahoogroups.com> 
  Sent: Tuesday, February 13, 2007 8:32 AM
  Subject: About Clare


  About Clare and to those who are involved in this discussion:


  One of Clare's last requests was that we help others really get to know her more on a personal level.  She realized how little we knew of her personally and wanted to share herself. I do not feel that we broke confiedentaillity or ethics by honoring her wishes. She was not a client but a good friend to all. I also want you to know that in the ceremony we included the entire psychodrama community and the love you shared and all the blessings that occurred on the stage that she so worked so hard to maintain. She watched the last Souldrama about building briges and peace.

  Tom, John  and Ann, I know you were honoring her and protecting her confidentiality our of love and respect. I know Clare would appreciate and love that.

   More importantly I also know Clare spent her life trying to foster peace and goodness and the last thing she would want now is her community being in disagreement about a ceremony honoring her while she was alive. 

   If we are to truly honor her, let us remember what she dedicated her life to and that was peace so let there be peace and love among us. 

  Connie Miller
  Grouptalk mailing list
  List at grouptalkweb.org
  http://grouptalkweb.org/mailman/listinfo/list_grouptalkweb.org
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